Railing on the balcony, feeling the wind as it rustled and brushed his hair, he stood. The height didn't bother him. He was used to heights. But the fall.. Won't that be painful? 'It's fleeting', the pain that death comes with, he reminded himself. Always second best to the one he received at the merciful hands of Life. His lips twitched at the irony. Sometimes it's best to let it go. He braced himself and stood on the railing. Envisioned the fall. Looked up, sneering while he did so, he thanked god for being so kind. And he jumped...
"Why?" God asked, as he stood draped in whites at the gates of heaven. "Why did you do that?"
"I was bored", he replied casually without flinching. God forced a contemplative smile. "So am I.."
The fog disappeared. The golden gate was swapped with a worn out wooden fence. He could smell the tarmac. "He is alive, Thank god!!" someone yelped with a shrill voice. He got up, bloody nose and badly bruised legs were the only remnants of the mighty fall. He dusted his jackets and started walking gingerly.
"How did you survive that fall?" They asked, astonished.
"I never fell. I just failed", he said.
Just one doubt.
ReplyDeleteHow a bloody nose and bruised legs are "remnants" here?From what I know remnant=remains and bruised legs or the bloody nose are not the remains of the person since he is alive.
What I know is you didn't read the blog to "read" it but to analytically assess it. Cheers. Everything I write is left up to readers discretion mate. So remnants could mean anything "you" feel it is. :)
ReplyDeleteI was not reading but perusing.
ReplyDeleteThe motive behind article could be anything but the article in its entirety should make sense.I was not assessing it either.Psychological and faithful events cannot be "analytically" assessed.I was just curious to know what you were trying to say when you said "remnants".
Now that you pointed out, remnants WAS a poor choice of word. Reminder perhaps would have been okay.. Thanks for pointing out anyways. Appreciated. (I'd appreciate if you tell me which word would have fitted perfectly)
ReplyDeleteWell, first off I appreciate you being open to ideas of others.
ReplyDeleteSince its hard to substitute only the "remnants" word, I`d have approached to the causal effect somewhat like this "He got up, bloody nose and bruised legs were the only signs of visible pain he endured the fall"
One suggestion (u can say "f**k off i dont want your suggestion! ") An article is better expressed with a greater intensity when the writer uses simple language with minimum word play.I notice you have a very very strong vocabulary.Having a strong vocab is really a big thing.But one should know when,where and how to play with words cuz if used in wrong scenarios it could really mess everything up.
Keep up the good work.And let me visit you every now and then.I`d love to read interesting articles like the one we are talking about.
Cheers mate !
Just as you mentioned Vocab, this was my first attempt to cram up high-end words in my otherwise simple writing. I just wanted to see how people react as I am also a firm believer of "Keep it simple". Thank you for the suggestion nonetheless. A writer needs suggestion from shrewd readers like you who can improve'em. Cheers.
ReplyDelete